My teachers once said to me that it isn’t often in life that I will know things. When you do know something, they said, then use that and act upon it.
It’s not that this was an esoteric secret, it’s just that I’d never thought to think about the fact that there are things I know inherently somehow, things that I have a good idea about and many more that I just don’t know.
So many things in life are uncertain. Most of the time, at best, we make an educated guess, we do our best and hope things work out. But sometimes we know. And when we know, then we also know what to do and where that will lead us. This was their point, when I know, then I should let nothing stop me from using my knowingness.
Today is the anniversary of the day I was born. You may call it my birthday, but since I celebrate my birthday at a different time of year I think of this as a time of year when life seems to open to me. And this week has opened to me.
This week we met my father and his wife in Mexico City and we flew to the Campeche and Yucatan area. We are spending time together, of course, but part of the intent of the trip was for me to see some of my roots, some of my father’s heritage.
The trip has been, unexpectedly, very tourist-like. We have gone and seen Mérida, Campeche, the pyramid sites of Edzná, Uxmal, the city where my dad was born called Ciudad del Carmen; we also went to a small ecological area called Celestún. We saw some family in Ciudad del Carmen and drove around the neighborhood where my father grew up and went to school. We saw his local church and another church who had acquired their land as a donation by one of my father’s uncles. (This uncle had bequeathed quite a bit of land, donating several plots of land to various religions, no doubt to cover his basis!) The only thing that we didn’t get to do was to see my grandparents and great-grand parent’s graves.
Even with all of these sites, nothing stirred me, nothing touched me or felt like it was a part of me or my past. It was as if I were the complete stranger to these places that I am.
Still, I came to a place of knowingness several times on this trip.
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I just read this. Happy bgirthday Kalyn.
Hug from Charlotte